


DS9 Purim Spiel, Chapter 1

by Treon



Series: DS9 Purim Spiel [1]
Category: Megillat Ester | Book of Esther, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Collection: Purimgifts Day 1, Gen, Jewish Holidays
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-13
Updated: 2019-03-13
Packaged: 2019-11-16 15:42:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18097262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Treon/pseuds/Treon
Summary: A beauty contest, a plot, and a celebration, loosely based on the Purim story





	DS9 Purim Spiel, Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [The_Capricious_One](https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Capricious_One/gifts).



> Purim Sameach!

_(A man struts onto the stage.  He's wearing a Captain's Starfleet uniform with long and pointy shoes.  He is the Reader.)_  
  
_Reader (takes out a scroll and unrolls it. He looks about and then clears throat, then reads as if to a melody): It came to pass in the days of Quark the Barkeep, this is the same Quark who ruled DS9-_  
  
_Man from Audience (interrupts): The Promenade!_  
  
_Reader (without missing a beat): This is the same Quark who ruled the Promenade, with its many shops and service outlets.  And it was in those days, that Quark made a feast..._  
  
  
It was a very special time on DS9.  The station was hosting its first interstellar trade conference.  Delegations from all over the quadrant would convene to learn about the commercial opportunities offered by the station and the wormhole.  
  
Quark intended to make good use of the opportunity.  He had no idea how it all so quickly degenerated into screams and yells.  
  
The entire promenade gathered round, as one furious Dabo girl berated the Ferengi.  "No way am I going to take off my clothes for you!!"  
  
"I didn't ask you to parade around naked!" Quark defended himself.  Though now that she mentioned it, it was probably a good idea.  "I just made some fashion suggestions."  
  
The Dabo girl simply huffed.  "You'll be hearing from my lawyer!"  
  
"You can't leave!" Quark was now getting desperate.  "The conference starts in a week!"  Ships had already docked and business was on the uptick. He needed their money!  
  
She simply turned her back on him.  
  
Quark looked balefully as the girl disappeared down the Promenade.  Then turned to the audience. "Show's over! Anybody who wants to stay, cover charge is ten strips of Latinum."

The audience quickly dispersed.  
  
Quark turned to survey the scene, mumbling in the meantime under his breath that Dabo girls like this one made a mockery of the profession.  Beside which, now he had to find a new dabo girl before the conference started. He was about to lose a LOT of money.  
  
"Those girls with their free-wheeling ideas, what would they think of next?" a voice interrupted his thoughts.  
  
Quark looked up to see Odo, smiling that annoying not-exactly-humanoid smile of his.  
  
"If only," Odo continued, "if only there was a law against such despicable behavior."  
  
The Ferengi sighed. "Is there anything I can help you with, Constable?"  
  
The security man looked at the big sign above the entrance.  In garish colors it proclaimed "Quark's! Your one and only stop before the Gamma Quadrant!".    
  
"You're going to replace her?" he asked.  
  
"Not that it's any of your business, but it will not be good for business to be out a dabo girl."  
  
"Hm." The security man didn't seem about to add anything else.  
  
This conversation was getting on Quark's nerves.  "Now, if you'll excuse me..."  
  
"Why don't you run a beauty contest?"  
  
Quark turned back, impressed.  "That's.. actually a good idea."  
  
"You're welcome."  
  
_Reader: So it came to pass, when many maidens were gathered together unto Quark's Bar, Grill, Gaming House and Holosuite Arcade_  
  
Not that many women showed up for Quark's "Be the new Dabo Girl!" contest, but one certainly attracted his attention. Her face was covered in a veil, with her only her eyes showing, but that only enhanced the effect of her voluminous and sensuous body, filled in all the right places, and then some. She reached for his ear, giving him a long caress.  "Hi.. " She purred. "I'm Sasson-V'Yikar, but you can call me Sass."

Quark practically purred in response.  "Such a lovely name. Where are you from?"  
  
She batted her eyelashes at him. "I cannot honestly say."  
  
Quark smiled at her.  Well, it's not like he had much of a choice anyway.  
  
_Reader: And the Barkeep loved Sasson-V'Yikar (AKA Sassy Sass) above all the women, and she obtained grace and favor in his sight more than all the maidens; so that he set the royal crown upon her head, and made her dabo girl._

 


End file.
